Life is different now:Climbing

This evening I went climbing with my friend Ken. I seemed to be holding up OK emotionally, so I figured why not get out and get some exercise. Well, about 45 minutes into climbing, the emotional wall collapsed and I could barely contain myself enough to get out of the building. I basically fell apart the whole drive home (45 minutes). My buddy was great, supporting me, and allowing me to deal with my emotions in my own manner. I just wish none of this ever happened. I wish she would have spoken to me sooner, made me go to counseling sooner so that we would still be moving forward in our life together. I wish she would let me back in, just a little, to see if we can avoid becoming a statistic. If not, I will move on.